Sooo Surgery

Last week we took the babies (Rory and Anastasia) in for a well child check. Rory was the perfect picture of health. A little underweight but nothing Pedisure won't fix. Anastasia had a hernia that concerned the doctor. The doctor set her up with an appointment with a surgeon at Primary Children's Hospital for the following week. Their doctor is U of U affiliated but still she recommended Primary Children's since it's one of the best in the nation. (Or so I'm told).

Anastasia's appointment at Primary Children's was set up for early in the morning and it would have been difficult to bring all 3 children to the appointment. We we're able to spend the night at Char's folks' house the night before. Then they would watch Heidi and Rory while I took Anastasia to the hospital. 

We had a fun evening with Grandma and Grandpa. Grandma got to buckets of water for Rory to splash in since it was so warm. (And it was fun to watch him splash around outside).He even tried to say "bubbles", it came out as "bobeels" which was cute. Grandpa and Heidi Anne went on a search for a plastic pool to play in. They were sadly unsuccessful. But Heidi had fun playing in the water, too. 

 We had a fun little barbecue. Grilled chicken sandwiches for Grandpa and me, hamburgers for Heidi and Grandma. After it cooled down a little Heidi and I went picking strawberries. We used them on our ice cream for dessert. 

Grandma worked on my genealogy with me and taught me indexing. Which is where you go through old records (like obituaries, school records,or old census reports) and note down the different people listed. That way if someone searches for their ancestors they will find these links showing evidence of their family. It's pretty cool that people take their time to track down and mark others family history, never knowing if it helps or not. But to just have someone noticed and not forgotten is pretty special. 

The next morning I left for Primary Children's and the car wouldn't start. I prayed and asked Grandpa to come help me out. I was stressed, worried, and running late. Fortunately, he got the car started. We we're barely on time so I used valet parking for the very first time. Bless valet parking. 

We knew about the belly button (umbilical hernia) and Charlie suspected the left inguinal hernia. We just didn't know how bad it was. We figured that it was causing her pain and discomfort.What we didn't know about was her right inguinal hernia. These inguinal hernias are bad because it's the lower intestine that's protruding out of the abdominal wall. Which can cause fecal matter to become trapped, causing the intestine to rupture. Translation, bad hernias to have.

According to the doctor the younger the preemie the higher the likelihood of them having hernias. Apparently, the body doesn't get to close all the holes nor get a chance to develop properly. Just like how her heart had 2 murmurs due to prematurity, she has 3 hernias due to how early she was born. 

She'll have surgery on all three hernias on August 2nd at Primary Children's. (Keep her in your prayers, thoughts, or good vibes that day). Since she is so small and a preemie she'll have to stay for observation overnight at the hospital. Because we live in Wyoming, I'll be allowed to room in with her, I'll sleep and stay with her so she isn't all alone. I know the nurses are wonderful but I've already spent too many nights away from her due to hospitalization. 

What an Average Summer Day Looks Like...CHAOS

Here's what a normal summer day looks like this year. The last time I did this it was called What A Typical Visit Looks Like. Let's see the differences, shall we? My posts are a little shorter currently because the following happens nearly every day. But I think it's important to have down, so you know what I mean when I say "re-runs" (a typical day / activities) versus "highlights" (something new or different). 

12:30 AM - Wake up, and sigh because I stayed up "late" (10:30 pm). Tend to Anastasia, feed, change, and cuddle her a little. 
1:05  AM- Play on my phone, check Facebook. (Bad sleeping habits but I am WIDE awake  for some reason). Fall back asleep.
3:00  AM- Wake up, feed and change Anastasia. Check her 02 saturation. 
3:34  AM - Attempt to go back to sleep.
6:00 AM - Wake up, feed and change Anastasia. 
6:15 AM - Heidi is wide awake for the day. (Think of Anna in Frozen, "The sky's awake, so I'M awake!)
6:20 AM - Try to go back to sleep
6:30 AM - Char gets home from work. I give up on sleep and sneak in some reading. 
7:00 AM - Rory awakens. Reading didn't last long. 
7:15 AM - Change Rory and make breakfast for everyone. English muffins for Heidi Anne and me, we split an orange. Dry Fruit Loops and applesauce for Rory. 
7:55 AM - Go play / watch Rory. Listen to the news. Ahhh, adult human contact has been somewhat made. 
9:00 AM - Anastasia is up, (apparently, she is on a 3 hour schedule today). Feed and change her. Switch out her SP02 monitor for a new one. She's at 93% without oxygen, that works for me. Read and play with Rory while tending to Baby Girl. 
10:10 AM - Second Breakfast / morning snack. Carrots and a granola bar for Heidi Anne (she's trying to eat more healthy since the doctor told her to eat more fruits and vegetables. Somehow, coming from a doctor is more serious then when I tell her the exact same thing. Shaking head right now.)
10:33 AM - Back to play time. Try to fold laundry. Rory grabs it and throws the laundry on the floor. I keep trying for 10 more minutes and then give up and put the clothes back in the basket. Sigh, I'll try to get to it tonight or tomorrow when Char is home. 
11:00 AM - Nap time for Rory & quite time for Heidi Anne. I hurry and start a crock pot for dinner. I pick up the kitchen while I'm at it since the little people are sleeping. 
12:06 AM - Type up on my post what I have jotted down on a piece of paper about what's been going on. 
12:30 PM - Guess who's up and hungry again?? Feed, change, cuddle Stacy (One of her new nick-names. I like it, one of my best friends is name Stacy and she's a sweet, smart, strong, and kind young lady.) 
12:58 PM - Wake up Char for his day. Talk a little and get caught up on each other's days.
 1:33 PM - Rory's up from his nap.
 1:38 PM - Snack Time.
 1:45 PM - Char watches Rory while I attend to the laundry (again). This time it gets put away. Amazing!!
2:37 PM - Late Lunch for us, breakfast for Char. 
2:54 PM - Clean up from lunch, save leftovers (guess what's for dinner?)
3:00 PM - Char gets ready for work.
3:06 PM - And she's up, I could set a watch to her today. I balance stopping Rory from trying to pull at her SP02 monitor and the oxygen line while feeding the baby.
3:15 PM - Char kisses us each good-bye, then leaves for work in Ogden.
3:16 PM - Have Heidi keep an eye on Rory while I finish taking care of Anastasia. 
3:22 PM - Play with Rory while holding Stacy. Debate about putting him down for a late afternoon nap, after all he's acting sleeping. Heidi starts to read a book on the Kindle (we're letting her use it to read for summer break). 
4:00 PM - Heidi goes out to play with friends. She's been wanting to go out all day. 
4:20 PM - I surrender!! He is going down for a nap. He falls asleep right away. Sweet, I made the right choice. Cuddle the baby.  
4:30 PM - Call Char to see how his drive was, it also gives me more time to talk to him.
4:45 PM - Get off the phone with Char, while I was talking Ladybug has fallen asleep. A little reprieve from children. What to do, what to do? 
4:46 PM - Stare down the laundry. I can tackle it tomorrow when I have help again. Sneak in some rare reading time for myself. 
5:10 PM - Heidi comes to check in. 
5:14 PM - Type up what I've been up to. Back to my book.
5:21 PM - Anastasia's monitor goes off meanwhile she cries out. Yep, she's projectile vomited, again. Take care of her. 
5:43 PM - Rory wakes up while I'm feeding the baby. 
5:45 PM - Put Anastasia down, make Rory a sippy cup. Get Rory, change him, give him his drink. Pick Anastasia back up and finish feeding her. 
5:59 PM - Heidi comes home (I told her be home by 6:00 pm-technically she was). Get asked "What's for dinner?" Rory perks up at the word "dinner".
6:05 PM - Leftovers, leftovers are for dinner. 
6:22 PM - Pure chaos. Anastasia seems to get very fussy between 4 pm - 9 pm. This evening it started at  6:22 pm. At the same time Heidi can't handle the noise so she goes to play in her room. Then Rory knows neither I nor Heidi can't watch him like a hawk and that we can't play with him, which makes Rory more adventurous. Set Rory up with some toys while I care for Anastasia (feeding, changing clothes and diapers, soothing).
6:23 PM - Keep in mind, until Anastasia goes to sleep there is a screaming baby in the background, believe me I'm trying everything to calm her down. I think it's her hernia causing pain or discomfort personally. I remind myself that we have an appointment with Primary Children'd pediatric surgeon next week. Once she finally finishes pooing she'll be better (she's not constipated, believe me).
6:36 PM - It's quite, too quite. Look for Rory, he's not where I left him. Go check the halls and have Heidi check the rooms. He can only go so far. I start back down the hallway when I hear giggles. We follow the sounds of the giggles. The kid has crawled into a laundry basket, hiding the whole time! Silly boy, what is with him and laundry today? Seriously! He has all these toys to play with and he wants the laundry basket. 
7:06 PM - Ladybug is still fussy. We turn on the Simpson's. Heidi is entertained. Time to put Rory in nightclothes and brush his teeth for the night. I have to out him in his highchair while I brush his teeth, he has nowhere to go. (Insert evil laugh). 
7:11 PM - Rory is freed and ready for the night. Back to toddling he goes, just walking around because he can. Tugs on Anastasia's O2 line, along with any other cords or wires he can try to find. This would be so much easier if he understood the meaning of the word NO. But he's barely 15 months old, I remind myself. He doesn't understand it yet. 
7:36 PM - Simpsons are over, now Heidi is "bored". I turn on a show for me to listen to while taking care of the babies. Wouldn't you know it, Heidi likes it as well. Have Heidi start picking up baby toys in the living room. I try to involve Rory with the cleaning, normally we can get him to toss some toys in a box, but not today. Tonight he just pulls out whatever she tries to put away. We give up.
8:00 PM - Put Rory down for bed. Talk with Heidi a little while rocking Anastasia. Focusing on Anastasia so I let Heidi have another show to watch. 
9:00 PM - Turn on the news and tuck Heidi into bed. Since Anastasia has been on a 3 hour schedule I prep everything I'll need. It appears she isn't hungry and hasn't finished popping. But I do put her in nightclothes. The grand total of outfits worn by her today? Drum roll please? 4 outfits. 
9:21 PM - Anastasia is finally ready for a bottle and new diaper. She's calmed down quite a bit. 
9:45 PM - I think I nodded off there. But I put Anastasia to bed and finish watching the news. 
10:00 PM - Oh sweet comfort, my bed! Ah rest! Enjoy it while it lasts because I'll be up in 2 hours or so. 

Early Father's Day - Lots of Pictures

Char's Day is going to be out of town for Father's Day (they're going to drive the coast highway in Washington & Oregon) the family decided to celebrate it early.  We debated about wither or not it was safe to bring Anastasia out of isolation for a day. In the end we choose to go. It turned out to be Tiny Stacy's first adventure that didn't involve the medical field in any way, shape, or form! 

Heidi knew this was a rare and special occasion; Anastasia going somewhere besides the doctors. Furthermore, this would be the first time some family members had even meet Anastasia, and this was a special dinner for Grandpa. She wanted to dress up complete with a matching bow. Well, that made me want to put Rory in his church romper which matched her dress. Luckily, Anastasia has a dress. (We really need to get that girl more 0-3 month clothes for that baby girl). Anyways, we dressed her up and found a matching bow for her, too. I had aspirations of getting a  lovely picture with the three of them together, but that didn't happen. I didn't even get two of them in the same photo. However, I did get solo pictures of the kiddos. One day I'll capture the 3 of them together. 

I discovered that packing for a visit is like packing for an army now. I also packed the kids nightclothes to put on for the trip back home, it's a tip I learned from my friend Valerie. (Which worked out great!) It was a long car ride down, however, Char has been listening to a book on tape and we got so wrapped up in it we missed our exit. Which was fine, it gave us more time to listen to the book.

Despite the minor set back we were the first ones to Grandma's house. We got to help prep the dinner. We worked on the rolls, the salad,watermelon, and the cheesy potatoes. I try to make the cheesy potatoes at home but they never seem to come out quite right. Char worked on the stakes and my piece of chicken. Heidi Anne helped by picking the strawberries from Grandma's garden. 

Then we played outside until the rest of the family came. Almost all the cousins played outside, either on the trampoline, on the swing, with a hula hoop, running around the yard, or playing with the bubble machine. 

 Sometimes they came inside to see what trouble they could get into. Here are the boys emptying the diaper bag while they think no one is watching. 

Here are the girls getting a selfie with Aunt Sarah.

Everyone got a chance to hold Anastasia, for some people it was their very first time meeting her. Here she is with Aunt Sarah. 

Here is Aunt Millie with Max cuddling our little Lady for the first time. 

Swimming Lessons, Grandmas, and An Escape Artist

Grandma and Grandpa took Heidi Anne and Rory for a few days this weekend, giving me a little reprieve. It was so nice to have to worry and tend to only 1 child. I got more sleep then I have since before Rory was born.  I'm blessed to have in-laws willing to take the older 2 just so I can get some rest. 

Back in May we had Heidi Anne's swimming skills assessed. It was determined that while she has some skills she lacked confidence. They placed her in level 1, which is beginner's swimming. Thus far she is loving it. She goes every morning for 30 minutes. Her class was so big it was split into 3 groups. Since swimming is a good, general skill to have we went ahead and signed her up for the next session. 

Rory is getting more adventurous by the day. We had an improvised guard gate since we have a large opening from the living room to the kitchen. He has found several ways to get around this gate. Making us buy an new (expensive) custom guard gate. He shouldn't (shouldn't is the key word) be able to get around or climb over this one. 

Tiny Anastasia has fallen in love with the swing. She has to be rocked back and forth to settle down, especially between the witching hours of 4 pm-9 pm. I think she may have colic. She gets all fussy and can't be calmed. Or it could be that her acid reflex is getting even worse. Side note - that girl can projectile vomit. NONE of the other children did that. I guess this little Lady likes to be different.  

Memorial Day

Memorial Day was fun this year, despite Anastasia still being in quarantine.  I think it was because Char was off work that day. It seems like he works every holiday. We barbecued hot dogs for the kids, some chicken for me, and a special stake for Char.  Later in the afternoon, we watched a movie and had popcorn.

Once it got dark Char had a surprise for Heidi Anne. They were going to camp outside in the backyard. He had put up a tent and gathered all the warm blankets from the house. I joked who would cave in first and come inside due to the cold (it got down to 40 degrees that night). They headed outside and he started reading Harry Potter to her. Shortly afterwards, her breathing got more rhythmic and slowed down, he turned out the flash light. As soon as the light went out Heidi Anne's eyes popped wide open and she declared frantically "I want to go inside!". As they came back into the house Char said to me "That's why we don't go camping." We later determined that home was such a close option but if we were really camping she might have done better.

Getting to Know Heidi Anne

Heidi Anne's teacher had the students answer questions about themselves for the last day of school. Here are the questions and her answers. It will be fun to look back on this years down the road. I did correct her spelling, just a side note.

My favorite subject: Math
My favorite animal: Chipmunk
My favorite special: Gym  (Specials are gym, music, art, and science.)
My favorite food: Pizza
My favorite color: Red & Blue
My favorite show: The Simpsons 
My favorite sport: Soccer 
My favorite book: Magic Tree House books
My favorite field trip: Dinosaur Park in Ogden
My favorite school event: Enrichments (The after school program, she was in the arts & crafts group)
My best friends were: Trinity & Serenity
Second Grade in 1 word: Crying  (How sad is that one?)
Important thing I learned: How to be nice even when people are mean to you. (Sadness again)
What I am doing this summer: Swimming lessons, swimming, maybe move
What I want to be when I grow up: FBI Agent!!

He Can Walk and Other Thoughts

I guess I thought once Anastasia was released from the hospital that would be the end of the NICU Journey. That was niavie of me. One is not born 3 months early and have no side effects. Some we know about (like her small size, special caloric needs, and severe acid reflex). Others the severity is still unknown (like the ROP, the need of oxygen, heart murmurs, and Respiratory Distress Syndrome). Then there are a host of side effects and disorders that she may or may not have but needs to be monitored for, for example speech delays, movement delays, vision issues, just plain being behind her peers, or things like ADHD. Luckily, we're learning with Heidi Anne how to deal with child with ADHD.   

I guess I was in denial, I honestly thought for the longest time once she's home everything would go back to normal. I didn't plan on all these doctor appointments that are very far away, medications and having 2 different bottles each feeding. 

Today Rory was walking so much! Like it just clicked. He finally went "Hey, I like walking!!". He had a smile on his face and would walk back and forth across the room. However, if we praised him, he would sit down or pause and clap. We would just whisper to each other "Look at Rory, he's doing great!". Furthermore, when he steps on a different texture other than carpet, he will slowly get down onto his hands and knees and start crawling again. 

We've been doing spring cleaning these last few weeks (that's been taking up all my spare time). We're trying to minimize our things as much as possible since the next place we're going to live in will be either a townhouse or apartment. We haven't really de-cluttered in nearly 10 years of marriage. It was hard at first but once I realized we hadn't used some of these things in years and the thought of moving it (again) made donating the items much easier.  I'm talking at least 3 carloads of donations and a trailer full to the dump. We just have the kitchen left to go through. I think that's Saturday's project. 

I haven't really talked about it but this has been the hardest school year for Heidi Anne. The school work is easy, but she's been picked on and teased relentlessly. She says she loves school, which she's doing great academic wise, but dislikes the people part of it. Every morning she begs to stay home. She suffers from headaches, stomach aches and has become depressed. For example, someone at school kept teasing her until she shoved him (which was wrong of her). She lost the privilege of pool party day. Later that same day, the same boy PUNCHED her. He just got a talking to. These bullies are just getting smarter. The school says they crack down on bullies but it sure doesn't seem like it. If we're unable to move this summer we're seriously considering homeschooling her next school year. 

The babies have developed nicknames. Anastasia is; Lady, Ladybug and Stacy. Rory is our little Tiger. Heidi Anne wants to be called Chipmunk, not sure why on that one. 

Scary Mommy Moments....

Anastasia's growth this week: 

Weight: 6 pounds 9 ounces!! (Was 5 pounds 15 ounces)
Length: 46 Centimeters  (Was 45.75)
Age: 13 weeks old (Should be 1 week old)


I don't have everything nicely broken down into days. They just blurred together this week. Yeah, it's been one of those weeks. 




I had some scary mommy moments this week. I went to the restroom and when I came back Rory was chewing on a mini flashlight. I realized it was in pieces and the tiny battery was missing. (You know the button batteries that can burn tissue). I got him ready and woke up Char to tell him I was taking Rory to the ER and why. Char sleepily told me that the flashlight had broken in the wash and Rory must have gotten into the laundry and found it. It made me realize how quickly he can get into things and these accidents can happen to anyone. I used to judge those moms that said "I was only gone for a minute." Not anymore, because I didn't think there were any items that could harm him in the 1-2 minutes I was gone. When it comes to toddlers anything is possible. 

The next scary mommy moment was when Anastasia started having retractions which means her respiratory distress is worsening. They were mild but she needs to see a good doctor. (E,I one down in Ogden or Salt Lake). I increased her oxygen and switched her cannula. She didn't have nasal flares or abnormal grunting otherwise I would have taken her to the local ER (who would have sent us to Ogden). Besides, Char was working and I didn't have someone to watch the other kids. Kind of hard to find a sitter at 10:30 pm on a school night. 

The last one was after Anastasia's eye appointment, I had gotten up at 4:00 am got ready, got her ready and headed down to Ogden. She still has ROP but the Plus Disease has slowed down greatly. He put the eye surgery set for July on hold for now, which is good news. (Appearently, she had eye surgery scheduled and they forgot to mention it to me.) But I know about it now. I asked the doctor what and how far she can see. He replied "Less then a newborn. Her vision is around 3-6 inches up close, any further then that it's just colors and vague shapes."

We did some drive thru errands while down there (since we can't go inside), then headed home. On the way back home I nodded off (again). I awoke, heading for the road barriers, meanwhile a semi-truck was honking loudly trying to warn or wake me up. I sadly struck one of the barriers and made a little mark on the car. But we were safe. 

These early morning appointments are killing me. We're praying that the home rents or sells soon. 

Rory has been teething this week. Poor guy. But in other news we've caught him walking more and more each passing day. It's come to a point the only times he is still is when he's sleeping or in his high chair eating. One of his favorite foods are raviolis and pieces of bread. Whenever I feed him bits of bread it makes me think of feeding a baby duck. 

Rory's Footprint at birth versus Anastasia's          Hand print at birth compared to a quarter!! 

A Teething Toddler + A Preemie With Thrush = A "FUN" Week

Anastasia's growth this week: 

Weight: 2680 Grams!! (Was 2356Grams)
Length: 45.75 Centimeters  (Was 45)
Age: 12 weeks old (Should be 40 weeks gestation)







Public Service Announcement
This helps explain why I've been giving Anastasia Sonia Rose's age in two different ways. More often then not this helps to remind me why my 3 month old hasn't cracked a smile or isn't able to control her head. Yes, she is 3 months old, but she should be a newborn. She could catch up or be 3 months behind everything until she's roughly 2 years old. It's also nice to know that other preemie moms face a similar struggles and that I'm not alone. 

Mother's Day Weekend
We celebrated Mother's Day as a family on Saturday since Char will be sleeping / working on Sunday. I've been craving a chicken leg quarter smothered in BBQ sauce actually seared on a charcoal BBQ, complete with those charred sections. Some may call that slightly burnt, I call it tasty. (Bet you want some now....) Char bought a cheap charcoal grill and we had our first BBQ at our house in nearly 3 years! Then it rained. So we had to move everything from the grill to the oven to finish cooking. But at least it had those charred markings I wanted so badly. 

Sunday was a gloomy, rainy day. Not at all spring like or even a hint of sunshine. I remember when Heidi Anne was younger we would go to the park and have the first family picnic of the year on Mother's Day. Maybe we'll start that tradition back up next year, (weather permitting). Today was just a normal Sunday, Char slept and then went to work. I did get 2 out of 3 kids bathed today so success!! I was going to attend church today when the children have been working on a special program but by the time I got the kids ready church had started 20 minutes earlier. I wasn't even ready. Sadly, we skipped it all together.
But I did get the kids ready at least. Getting closer. Give me a few more months and I might have this down. 

Some days I feel like I rock this motherhood thing. Other days I feel like I'm just faking it, and I pray the kids don't catch on to the fact that I have no clue what I'm doing. Right now I'm in survival mode which means I'm not getting much sleep, I have a sick child and basically I'm doing this solo due to Char's work schedule. (Thus, my standards are low).

My three objectives are:
1. Are the kids dressed? ---Yes
2. Are the kids fed? ----------Yes
3. Is the house on fire? -----NO

If the answers above matches then that was a pretty good day. Anything beyond that is a bonus. For example; kitchen clean, bathroom spotless, any vacuuming, laundry. ect. I'm not depressed, I'm just trying to make it through the day / until I can sleep again. Think of it as finials week. You devote yourself entirely to school that everything else falls by the wayside. You're stressed not depressed. That's me right now, only I don't know when finals will end. I'm guessing survival mode will come off in about 6 months (barring any unforeseen situations).  

Monday
I'm sleepy but I like writing, it de-stresses me and helps to put the day into perspective. Most of what I write never makes it to the blog. I write and then erase things. Somehow just the act of writing about whatever the subject or issue is helps me focus on a plan of action.

Right now I'm feeling a little down, (I currently HATE checking the mail because I know there are bills in there). Anastasia has doctor appointments at least 1-2 times a week down in Utah which turn into full day excursions due to the distance. I GROSSLY underestimated her special medical needs. 

I don't know what the right course of action is. Part of me wants to just move back to Utah downsize and get an apartment. Then we would be closer to Chars family (Heaven knows I could use all the extra help I can get), Char's work is there (which he likes more) and ALL of Anastasia's doctors. Char could go full time at his part time job and pay down these medical bills that we're drowning in (plus the student loans as well).

Odd, normally this is where some answer suddenly comes to me. I've got nothing. Just more confusion and inner conflict. Time to phone a friend.

I talked with our landlord, if we can find someone to buy the house or sublease we can move. They're such understanding and kind people. Just pray we find someone soon, I have 3 doctor appointments this week alone! Anyone need a place to rent or knows of someone looking to rent??

Tuesday
It's 4:40 am on Wednesday and I can't sleep. So you get the pleasure of my company. I'll tell you about my day. It was long, stressful, and heart breaking.

It started off at 6:00 am with Heidi Anne having cold like symptoms but she didn't have a fever so it could just as easily be allergies. We packed up the babies for a doctors appointment down in, you guessed it, Ogden.

One of the saddest things we did was take a stray cat that adopted us to the animal shelter. NOT the one here in Wyoming but down in Ogden. It was a miserable car ride, the poor thing knew something was up and had the most pitiful meow. But we can't take the kitty with us when we move and we don't know how the new people with react to a stray. It was a hefty price but it's a no kill shelter and we promised Heidi Anne we wouldn't let Sweetie the cat be put to sleep. It was a bit heart breaking because we've all become attached to the kitty.

We then went apartment browsing. We went to 7 places with a toddler and a baby with special needs. I wouldn't recommend ever doing that. It was weird how people would stare at the O2 tank poking out of the hiking backpack or when they asked if they could see the baby we responded with a firm NO. Eventually, one of us would stay in the car with the babies while the other went to talk to the people inside. It just made life easier.

Soon it was time for Anastasia's doctor appointment. Since she doesn't have much of an immune system we were taken back to a clean room right away (no waiting room for us)  Both babies where super hungry, tired, and cranky by then. We changed them and feed them bottles while we waited for the doctor. We got her weight (5 pounds and 15 ounces) and her length (18 inches on the dot). Unfourtantly, she is suffering from thrush, which is a yeast infection in your mouth, cheecks, throat. Which is as painful as strep throat.  


The Rest of the Week
We've been deep cleaning, packing and taking care of a teething toddler, a medically fragile preemie with thrush, and a sick 7 year old. This has been a hard week!!

Anastasia can only drink 40 mls at a time before she quits from the pain. Then she's hungry roughly 70 minutes later. I've been living off 30 minute naps. While trying to care for the other two and keep up the house. I pray this doesn't last long or ends before I crash. Why am I writing when I should be sleeping? This is a bit therapeutic, I guess.

I took Anastasia to the eye doctor on Thursday morning. She still has ROP but he couldn't find the Plus Disease, he was very perplexed. He can't believe it, thus we have another appointment on Tuesday morning. This super early morning appointments are killer.

Anastasia is in so much pain, she won't eat much, and it's causing me concern. I tried to get her a doctor appointment but the only one open was in 30 minutes. No way we could make that. I just dealt with 2 very cranky babies and didn't get much done today. I need to clean!
Better go while, by some miracle, are both asleep.

Survival Mode: ON

Anastasia's growth this week: 

Weight: 2356 Grams!! (Was 2322Grams)
Length: 45 Centimeters  (Was 44.5)
Age: 11 weeks old (Should be 39 weeks gestation)









The Weekend
Sorry, this weekend kind of blurred together. (I have a feeling that will happen over the next few months). Char went to the store alone because we can't take Anastasia out in public for 3 months minimum (except for doctors appointments). Which translates to no church, errands, or gatherings for Anastasia and me. We're basically under house arrest. But visitors are more then welcome to come by. I could use human contact. Just ignore the messy house.  

I'm so sleep deprived basic tasks are hard to do. Last night I only got an hours sleep at a time, then was up for nearly an hour. I can't think far enough ahead to dinner. I'm trying to learn (quickly) but apart from doctor appointments, I can't think to far into the future. I guess every post NICU mom is like this, living in survival mode. I know it won't be like this for long, I just have to make it through this. 

Monday 
There was a Monday?!?


Tuesday 
Today was crazy! It started with three hours of sleep the night before. Then I got up at 4:45 for a doctor appointment at 7:00 am. So I get Anastasia ready (but couldn't feed her), pack up the "small" O2 tank, monitor, and diaper bag stuff into an old hiking bag of Char's. Then the two of us headed out at around 5:15 am.

I'll skip the drive (side note almost hit a bunny) and pick up at the hospital. We check into the NICU and Anastasia got a dose of medication to help dilate her pupils. I needed to get her blood work done which should have taken 10 minutes turned into a 70 minute wild goose chase. The whole time, NICU nurses are checking to see if her eyes need more medication (which they did). Finally, we got the blood work done. 

I meet with Anastasia's dietitian real quick while I waited for the neonatal ophthalmologist (premature baby eye doctor). Apparently, Anastasia isn't growing like she should be. In fact she's stalled a little. The plan is to feed her 2 ounces every 4 hours. This will be pushing it, but she needs to gain weight. 

Then we had the eye doctor come in and examine her. Even though Anastasia was strapped in her car seat she still put up a fight when it came time for the doctor to look at her dilated eyes with the bright light. It took 2 nurses to help him out. Sadly, she has ROP still with Plus Disease added as well. The way the doctor explained Plus Disease to me like this: Imagine a stick of Pull Apart Twizzlers, they are plied on top of each other and intertwine. Now imagine that is happening to the blood vessels around her eyes. We're watching it for now, but it could take laser surgery. 

By this point Anastasia had let her hunger and general frustration be well known. But the eye drops can make infants dizzy so she couldn't eat for at least 30 minutes. I was given a choice of waiting in the nice, quite, dim room then feeding Anastasia or take my chances on the road. I picked option 1. Once she could eat, she sucked down the food quickly. I knew I had made the right choice.  

I drove home where after school I took Heidi Anne for swimming assessments. Then we went to the store to try to find preemie diapers. Found lots of other things but not those tiny diapers.I guess Char will have to try Smith's tomorrow.  


Wednesday 
I've never had a baby who loves to be swaddled. With Anastasia the tighter the better she sleeps or relaxes. Char is great at wrapping her. I say her wraps her like a sushi roll. Nice, tight, and everything stays in. See? All cozy, even after 4 hours of sleep. 

Compare it to how it looks like when I swaddle her. It looks like a sloppy taco. Everything is out, in fact she's barely covered. Anastasia can wiggle loose. Everything is falling out. It'll take some more practice I know. I just hope I get it down before she hates being swaddled. (Which is what I bet will happen). 

Here is a picture of Rory. He's sad because he ran out of waffles. I thought it looked sweet. He has an expression of "Where did it all go?". Don't worry he got another waffle. 

Thursday
Today Char's sister Emily came to visit. She brought dinner with her as well (yeah no sandwiches tonight, we're living off sandwiches right now.) She's super busy with work and 2 little ones of her own. At family gatherings she's in high demand. It was nice to get some one on one time with her. After dinner she held tiny Anastasia for a bit then got rare Rory cuddles afterwards. (I think Rory was jealous of the special attention Anastasia got from Aunt Emily). 

It was nice to have a visitor. We can't take Anastasia out to any crowded areas (a crowd is 8 or more people), which means no church, family gatherings, or simple errands. So visitors are more than welcomed or you could text or chat me on Facebook. It gets a little lonesome sometimes. 

Friday  
Did I mention we got a concentrator? A concentrator takes the surrounding air, concentrates the oxygen, and pushes it through the tubing. This is safer and more portable then regular O2 tanks.  

It makes her easier to move but I'm still tied down by wires. Tonight she made a field trip to the living room without having to haul an O2 tank with us. It'll be nice when she's wire free and I can do things like cook and clean or hold her while tending to Rory. It's hard having your youngest being so ill, I bet it would be hard no matter which child is sick.