So as we have visited various different people there are some rules with newborns that need to be observed that should not have to be spoken.
1. The parents are the parents and their word is the end of the argument, the rules they make you keep end of question. if you teach them bad behaviors at your house then they will have bad behaviors at our house.
2. With children keep talking to them positively, no negative comments about parents or other people.
3. Do not pressure other family members into having kids, it causes resentment towards that couple and child that is not needed.
4. Reward good behavior and ignore bad behavior by not making a big deal out of something that is small.
5. Don't expect to be entertained, it is a new born they don't do things that most other babies do, they sleep, eat and need diapers changed. They don't play games well and talking happens later in their life, please keep projections to yourself.
6. Parents are in what is called new baby fog, it causes parents to be more forgetful, sleepy and sometimes irritable. Be understanding, it takes time for a baby to sleep through the night.
7. Don't take things personal, be understanding and realize new parents are going through Hell trying to get a baby to sleep through the night.
8. Apply the Kindergarten rule, If you can't say something nice don't say anything at all.
9. Stay open to learning. Research is constantly expanding knowledge about what is most effective. For example, recent research pokes holes in the old theory that you'll spoil a baby if you pick them up when they cry. SIDS is a real fear for millions of parents each year nearly 3,000 die each year from this. Stay curious and join your kids in learning all you can.
10. Remember that the most powerful teaching anyone can do is by example. In a time when children are desperately in need of adults who will teach them virtue, let your life be that lesson.
11. Do not to take over and do things your way.
12. Avoid hogging the infant. As much as you love your new grandbaby, it’s important for Mom to bond with her. Your job is to help her do that in whatever way you can.
13. Don’t insist that what worked for you is going to work for her. Go ahead and offer advice, but don’t get upset if it’s rejected.
14. Refrain from bringing up old hurts. Now is a healing time for the family.
15. Avoid inviting several of your friends to see the baby at once. You’ll have plenty of chances to show off your adorable grandbaby when she’s a little older.
When You're Awesome Anything Can Be An Adventure!
Monday, July 28, 2008
Sunday, July 20, 2008
Not Postpartum Depression
Also, Char took me on a "date" yesterday. We went and got pizza, rented a movie, Definitely Maybe, which was really cute. The baby slept through out the whole movie!!!! It was so exciting and wonderful to have some time with Char alone.
Don't worry I am still happy and healthy! Honestly I sometimes wish Heidi would scream at the top of her lungs at 2 in the morning just to piss off the upstairs neighbours. They are so loud and careless, yet she is too forgiving and refuses to let it bother her for more then a few seconds. However Mommy and Daddy are not so forgiving. (Insert evil laugh)
Friday, July 18, 2008
Dead Parents
That however is not what has kept us from taking millions of photos and posting weird sleep deprived blogs, it is the fact that little Heidi has hit a growth spurt, during daytime hrs she eats about every hr on the hr, at night time it is every two hrs. Charlie has insisted that I get a fullish type night sleep that is at least five hrs. But Heidi is just chugging along, every hr today she has had 2 oz of breast milk. I am losing sleep in trying to keep up with little Heidi's demanding tummy, so as a consequence to my health failing we are in accord to bottle feed her formula.... not happy about it but knowing that it needs to be done. It is so hard it feels as though I am a failure as a mother, not being able to do what most mothers can easily do. I know that lots of people I know formula feed and they are not bad mothers but I feel as though I need to do the very best for my baby. It seemed at the hospital that everyone breast feeds and anyone who can't is a bad mother, I kept trying but the baby has a hard time doing it. We have been trying to do pumped milk in bottles, but it is too hard for me to pump then feed, then change, then rock to sleep. No one told me what recovery was supposed to be like, the soreness, the itching, the head aches, the flu like symptoms the bleeding slowing down then speeding up. I had never known I could cry over dropping a burp towel but I can and have. No one told me what bonding with a baby was all about, I thought that once they were out that they would connect with you and there would be lots of love shared. It is that way with Heidi but there are so many doubts.
Monday, July 14, 2008
Picky Baby
On to today, Charlie was being nice and letting me sleep some, however, baby was not having this sleeping thing and decided to stay up for like 3 hrs until she was fusing up a storm and Char woke me up and had me hold her and she fell right asleep and didn't wake up for 3 hrs.
She just likes being held by the opposite person.
Growing Baby
Sunday, July 13, 2008
Racist Baby
So Charlie was
playing with the baby and bugging me saying that the baby is a hippy, raising a hand and saying power to the people, or down with diapers! but then he went we hail in a german accent and it dawned on us that we have an extremely german white sounding baby i mean Adeliede Annelise, can you get any more white? When Heidi just wasn't white enough.
Sleepy Baby Issues
Bath Time
Saturday, July 12, 2008
The Birth
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